Surfers' Paradise
Surfers' Paradise, Australia: 3rd-5th February
It was a rushed atmosphere in the room that I woke up to this morning, but the drinks and late night kebab have not made for a winning combination for me, so I am slow to my feet and my packing, but manage to get it all done before we head to the bus station. Our next stop, Surfers Paradise. A name that, I have on good authority, the place does not deserve. Although home to beautiful beaches and good weather, the surf here is apparently average at best and the sea’s full of amateurs and tourists. At least that is what many Australians, who I imagine know a hell of a lot more than me about surfing, believe. Later, once we arrive and are taken on a tour of the place, Mollie actually informs the group that the name, Surfers Paradise, derives from bureaucratic bullsh!t rather than a love of the sport. A rich man in the area opened a hotel called Surfers Paradise some time ago, but to his misfortune the area and his hotel weren’t doing nearly as well as he had hoped so he convinced the powers that be the town needed a rebrand. The walk ended with what may be one of my favourite things ever, a free burrito! Apparently Guzman y Gomez, better know as GYG, has an offer when one downloads their app: in the form of free food – my favourite type of offer!


After the burrito most of us end up back at the hostel and more specifically in the pool playing a variety of games; some actual games, others silly competitions, like best handstand and who can hold their breath the longest – in other words imagine a bunch of overgrown children in a pool. However, unlike a child, I no longer have endless reserves of energy, so I head for a nap, need to get ready for the night to come. Once up from the nap I eagerly head to the bottle shop to stock up on drinks and spy myself a beer pong kit that I do not have the will power not to buy! Pre’s takes a while to get going but, after beer pong ring of fire and a few drinks here and there in between it is time to head out for a night on the town. The evening starts great, singing, dancing and more drinks – what’s not to like. However, it takes a bit of a turn for me when our group is leaving a club which has ball pit. I find myself being questioned by the police: unfortunately I have apparently been accused of touching up a female club-goer. This is of course absolute bollocks. Luckily my friend has a video of the only time I was in the ball pit and I am only in there with people I know, which proves it. Unfortunately in my drunken state I get myself a little worked up and decide that its best the night is over for me. To be clear nothing really happened here, the police just took some details and told me to enjoy the rest of my night and, as multiple of my friends said, I did fall into the generic description of a white guy in a white shirt black trousers with a beard. Having said that it ruined my night but, I am aware, not as much as for the poor woman who was the victim of the attack. Bright side, it was nice to see so many of my new friends come to my side and try to cheer me up. On the night, however, I went to bed relatively pissed off.




The next day I woke up after a lie-in feeling a little better but with what I believe is a reasonable distaste for Surfers’ Paradise in my mouth. Good thing about a lie-in is that I wake up in time for the group lunch we are heading to. It is exactly what I need, a combination of great Italian food and incredibly weird but extremely amusing conversation where no topic seemed to be off limits and a crazy number of, ‘what ifs’ and ‘would you choose this or that’ type questions were fired across the table. I spend the rest of the afternoon chilling around the hostel. Later Charlie, Beth and I head to the Sky Point for some amazing views of the city by night. I can’t help but be a little disappointed by the design of the view point, the glass is extremely reflective as glass tends to be and so it seems silly to me to the cover the whole area in very bright harsh lights making it impossible to see the view unless one smushes their face against the glass like a child or a drunk, as Alex did the other night at the kebab place (see picture). After a quick cocktail in the sky we head back to the hostel and I decide that after the events of the previous night I am just gonna have an early one and head off to bed.
Sky Point View




The next day I treat myself to another lie-in, Surfers is a pretty chilled placed with not much to do, so I am embracing the vibe. Once I am up I go to meet the Bargain Babes on the beach for a sunbathe and chill. After building up a sweat working on my tan I head back to the hostel and have a shower before heading back out with Charlie and Aaron to go to the amazingly named Condom Store, one of the stops on the city tour we had done a couple days ago.This place, as well as selling what I can only describe as an impressive number of sex toys and other fun accoutrements, also sells a large number of funny t-shirts and even personalised ones. The perfect place for people that have a bad t-shirt night coming up, where we have to buy tees for other people. Once the shirts are purchased, the remaining time in Surfers is spent in a fairly chilled fashion: a quick lunch, some pool time and then another group meal at a local bar, Goldies before I once again have an early night, I have to say I am ready for Brisbane tomorrow!
Olivia (right) is not impressed
(click on the top right hand icon)
Group lunch


Alex's smushed face
I hope you've enjoyed reading my blog.
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